Ever wondered?

In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Myer hairdryer:

'Do not use while sleeping'.

(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Chips:

You could be a winner!  No purchase necessary.  Details inside.

(The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap:

'Directions:  Use like regular soap'.

(And that would be how???)

On some frozen dinners:

'Serving suggestion:  Defrost'.

(But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert

(printed on bottom):

'Do not turn upside down'.

(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

'Product will be hot after heating'.

(And you thought????...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron:

'Do not iron clothes on body'.

(But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:

'Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication'.

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:

'Warning: May cause drowsiness'.

(And...I'm taking this because???)

On most brands of Christmas lights:

'For indoor or outdoor use only'.

(As opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:

'Not to be used for the other use'.

(Now, somebody out there, help me on this.  I'm a bit curious.)

On Nobby's peanuts:

'Warning: contains nuts'.

(Talk about a news flash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:

'Instructions:  Open packet, eat nuts'.

(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

I don't blame the company, I blame the parents for this one:

On a child's superman costume:

'Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly'.

On a Swedish chainsaw:

'Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals'.

(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)


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