1. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
  2. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
  3. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
  4. "A modest man, who has much to be modest about." —supposedly Winston Churchill, about Clement Attlee


More in Wikipedia: here

and on this humour site: Paraprosdokians - 37 Examples

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